


Worth Fighting For

by Mamacita5012



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Ben Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves Friendship, Brother/Brother Incest, Caring Diego Hargreeves, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Smut, First Kiss, Flashbacks, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Smut, Ghost Ben Hargreeves, Good Brother Ben Hargreeves, Good Brother Diego Hargreeves, Good Brother Klaus Hargreeves, Good Sister Allison Hargreeves, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Drug Use, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Pseudo-Incest, Slow Burn, Sober Klaus Hargreeves, Soft Diego Hargreeves, Stuttering Diego Hargreeves
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-02
Updated: 2020-01-29
Packaged: 2021-02-25 05:07:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,128
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21650590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mamacita5012/pseuds/Mamacita5012
Summary: AU Set 8 years after Klaus ran away from home, 4 years before Five returns.Klaus is doing great getting sober, and Diego is a big sweetie pie. They slowly begin building a life together.
Relationships: Allison Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves & Diego Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves/Diego Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves/Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Klaus Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves/Klaus Hargreeves
Comments: 56
Kudos: 151





	1. Change

It’s been a month since Klaus got high. No alcohol either. 

30 days of Klaus, holed up in this shitty “apartment” of Diego’s. Not eating, not sleeping, and certainly not helping his brother. Hell, if he’s being honest with himself, he hasn’t even been  _ kind _ to his brother. His brother who found him in an alley, brought him home, got him warm, cleaned him up, stitched his wounds, got him tested, made him eat, got him sober,  _ kept _ him sober, etc. etc. etc. 

This wasn’t the first time either. They’ve done this dance before; Klaus has lost track of how many times Diego has helped him get clean, and he’s too embarrassed to ask. It’s like their lives have been on repeat for the past 8 years. An endless cycle of alcohol, drugs, prostitution, rock bottom, getting sober...repeat. 

Klaus somehow always fucks it up. 

Repeat.

But something is different this time.  _ Diego _ is different. 

Klaus can’t quite put his finger on the change. Diego still has a soft spot for Klaus; that’s been there since they were kids…

Diego sneaking Klaus an extra cookie under the table. Diego hanging the fairy lights he found in the attic over Klaus’s bed, to keep the ghosts away. Diego propping himself outside Klaus’s bedroom door, listening for his brother’s screams, bringing him water and rubbing his back until he could forget about the nightmares and fall back asleep. Diego making Klaus be lookout on all their missions, so Klaus didn’t have to witness any  _ living  _ nightmares, and could (hopefully) stay safe and away from danger. 

That same soft spot is what made it so easy for Klaus to take advantage of Diego in the past. He’d let Diego help him get clean, then steal all his cash, or pawn all his stuff, or fuck some dealer on his bed. Leaving Diego to find him hours later, passed out in a pile of some stranger’s cum, high as a kite and naked as a jaybird. 

And somehow, Diego never saw it coming. Or maybe he did, and he was just an expert in denial. Either way, Klaus hated himself for it. Hated that the one person who ever tried to help him, was the one person he’d screwed over time and time again. 

Every time it happened, Klaus promised himself he wouldn’t go back. He couldn’t do that to Diego, not again. And he couldn’t trust himself not to. So he’d stay away, and find dealer after dealer who would fuck him and give him nice, clean drugs and a warm place to sleep. 

But Diego would always somehow find him. Coked out in some club bathroom, passed out in an alley, needle tossed aside, sleeping on a park bench, begging for change outside a gas station in the rain, blowing some dude in the back of a van. 

Diego had seen some of the shittiest things Klaus had done, yet he still came looking. Klaus didn’t deserve that kind of help, that kind of attention, that kind of love. But Diego kept offering it, over and over and over again.

So maybe it wasn’t Diego who had changed after all. Maybe it was Klaus, who could finally look at Diego, look at  _ his brother _ , and see what’s been there all along. Someone willing to help him, care for him, watch over him. Someone who could see past his shitty life and stick around waiting for things to get better. Helping Klaus  _ make _ things better. Knowing that Klaus  _ deserves  _ better. 

And that, Klaus thinks, is something worth fighting for. 


	2. Nice Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus has made it to 60 days sober, and Diego has a little surprise.

It’s been two months since Klaus finally agreed to get sober. 

60 days of Klaus retching in Diego’s trash can, covering his sofa in sweat, complaining about his cooking, and whining about the lack of a bathtub in this stinky boiler room. 

But Diego could live with that. He could live with anything if it meant Klaus would get sober. _Stay_ sober. 

Because they’ve done this before. This thing where Klaus says he’ll get clean, even cry to Diego about it sometimes, like he wants to so bad. 

And then he just...gives up. He leaves like it doesn’t even matter. Like Diego didn’t just spend the past 72 hours gleefully ignoring his other responsibilities to help his brother get clean. 

And Klaus usually takes shit with him, too. Money, valuables. One time he even took Diego’s phone--lost all his contacts.

And Diego knows he should care more about the leaving part than he does. He knows he’s too quick to forgive and forget. 

He isn’t always, not even usually. Only...with Klaus. 

It’s just....he can’t stay mad at Klaus. Never could, probably never will. 

He wants to. He tries to. He tells himself he’s not gonna let Klaus do this to him again. 

But when he finds Klaus passed out in the cold, or letting some douchebag fuck his face to score drugs, Diego can’t help himself. All he wants is for Klaus to be ok. Klaus _deserves_ to be ok. 

But Diego’s not sure how to make that happen. He realizes that _Klaus_ isn’t even sure how to make that happen. They’ve tried the rehab thing--it just doesn’t seem to be Klaus’s style. So, Diego takes him home, cleans him up, and tries his best to get him sober. _Keep_ him sober. 

And if that means Diego loses some money, or some pointless shit that doesn’t even matter to him, he can be ok with that. At least he’s trying, at least Klaus sees him trying. And he’ll keep trying until the day one of them dies, if it means Klaus knows he cares. 

But something is different this time around. _Klaus_ is different. 

Diego can’t quite put his finger on the change. Klaus just seems, so...grateful. 

Not at first. At first he was a little shit, like always. Whining, complaining, shouting at Diego to leave him the fuck alone. 

But after that first month, after the withdrawal symptoms calmed down, Klaus got...nice. Sweet, even. 

Helpful. 

Diego comes home from work and Klaus has made him dinner. He wakes up in the morning and Klaus has made coffee for them both to share at the kitchen table. He sends Diego to work with a brown paper bag full of healthy snacks, and funny little doodles Klaus has drawn, just for him. 

He picks up after himself, does their laundry, goes grocery shopping, sweeps the floor. One time Diego caught Klaus taking some leftovers to Al, and overheard his brother thanking him for letting Klaus stay with Diego in the boiler room. 

Diego realizes he’s acting like he did as a teenager, when he lived at home, when he tried to take care of all his siblings.

He’s acting like he did _before the drugs_. 

He’s acting like... _himself_. 

It was easy for most people to forget who Klaus was without the drugs. They’ve had ahold of him for so long. Most of his siblings forgot. But not Diego. Diego will never forget. 

Diego knew Klaus was kind, caring, loving, helpful, sweet. Diego knew Klaus could be those things again, if he could keep his mind clean and drug-free. 

And Klaus was proving him right. 

And so if Klaus could do the hard work of getting sober, staying sober, and start to live life as himself again, well then Diego could do something nice for Klaus. 

Klaus deserves nice things, and Diego wants to be the one to give them to him. 

So that’s why Diego has Klaus blindfolded, standing on the sidewalk, in front of a tiny little duplex. 

It’s not _nice_ , per se. Diego can’t really afford _nice_. But, it’s nice enough. And it’s definitely nicer than the boiler room. 

Diego keeps one hand on Klaus’s shoulder and one on his lower back, as he leads him up the sidewalk toward the door. They get to the front steps, and Diego spins him around, twice, just because. Klaus stumbles a bit, and giggles as Diego holds him steady. 

“Hold out your hand.” Diego says.

Klaus does, still giggling, and Diego reaches around to place a key in his palm. 

“What’s this?” Klaus asks, blindfold still in place.

“A surprise. Umm, uh, a gift. For your 60 days sober”

Diego reaches around Klaus’s neck to remove the blindfold. Klaus doesn’t say anything, he just stares at the paint-chipped door.

“I know-I know it’s not, great,” Diego stammers. He rubs the back of his neck nervously as Klaus turns around to look at him. 

“B-But it, I made sure it has a-a bathtub. I know, I know you re-really want one.” 

Klaus is silent for another moment, and then asks, “Diego, did you get me an apartment?” 

And now Diego’s really regretting this decision. He can’t tell if Klaus is surprised, annoyed, angry or happy. _And God, he thinks it’s just for him._

“Well...us. I-I got _us_ an apartment.” Diego’s looking down at his feet now, hoping Klaus will just interrupt him and put him out of his misery. 

“So-so you wouldn’t have to sleep on the couch anymore--you could have your own room. And, and you could take a bath...and-and...cook, in a real kitchen.” Klaus still hasn’t interrupted. 

“B-But I don’t have to...I can ask Al if he’ll let me stay...he probably hasn’t even found anyone else to rent that shitty place yet...I can just...go back there...if you want.”

Diego finally gets the guts to look up. And Klaus, he’s smiling. Just a little one at first, but it’s growing. Until he’s laughing, and then they’re hugging. 

And Klaus is jumping and laughing and they’re spinning, and Diego thinks he just might float away. 

“Come on,” Klaus finally shouts, as he pulls away from Diego to put the key in the door. 

“Let’s go check out our new bathtub!”

Klaus rushes inside, gushing about how big the living room is, but Diego is stuck, standing in the doorway. He can’t tell if Klaus means what Diego thinks he means, what Diego _wants_ him to mean. And he just can’t bring himself to go in yet. Not until he knows for sure. 

Klaus finally realizes he’s been talking to himself for the past 30 seconds, and rushes back to the front door to find Diego. Klaus grabs his hand, and pulls him inside. 

“Come on, I’ll let you have first dibs on the best bedroom.”

And Diego, finally, lets himself smile too.


	3. Nice Things (for each other)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus is 82 days sober.

82 days. Klaus has been sober for 82 days. 

He knows because every morning while he’s making coffee, Diego comes into the kitchen and writes a new number on the calendar. 

“Good job yesterday Klaus. 82 days sober. After today, it will be 83.”

At first Klaus laughed off this bizarre ceremony. Thought it was silly, pointless. Maybe even made him feel a little too much pressure. 

Although, he _did_ love the brand new cat calendar Diego bought for this sole purpose. 

‘ _Come on, you LOVE cats!_ ’ Diego had cajoled him. 

And the pink Sharpie Diego picked up at Walgreens was a nice touch. 

‘I _sn’t pink, like, your favorite color?’_ he had asked, scrunching his nose in confusion. 

But now that they’re 82 days into this little ritual, Klaus has found himself looking forward to it. He likes to watch Diego rummage through the junk drawer, not settling for the 15 other pens or markers he stumbles upon first. Wanting it to look just right, uniform, something a visitor may enjoy noticing or even asking about, while inspecting their kitchen walls. 

Diego seemed to want it to look perfect.

Seemingly, for Klaus. 

And that just made Klaus feel---well he couldn’t describe that feeling, but he knew it was a good one.

And he could also _feel_ the flood of relief wash over Diego as he turned away from the calendar to find Klaus doing something as mundane as grinding coffee beans, or measuring water into the pot, or grabbing two coffee mugs from the cupboard. 

Junkie Klaus would have never believed that sober Klaus could enjoy this type of life. Boring, he would have called it. But sober Klaus has come to realize that it is through these day-to-day routines that he can find the will to stay clean. His AA meetings helped him discover that routines can bring him peace, give him a sense of purpose. He’s never really had that before. 

Sure, back at the Academy they had routines. Reginald ran their childhood “home” like a military base, scheduling everything from training and meals to hair cuts and showers down to the exact minute. Klaus had found this particular type of regimen quite stifling. 

And their sense of purpose was _supposed_ to be helping the community, catching criminals, saving the world, blah blah blah. But Klaus couldn’t really see how hearing ghosts screaming 24/7 was really gonna help anyone. 

But his new routines _were_ helping him, and giving him a sense of purpose. He felt helpful, important, appreciated, wanted. 

So, he stuck to it. Wake up at 6. Make coffee. Pack Diego’s lunch. Have a cup with Diego before he heads to work. Take a bath (no more grimy semi-public showers for him). Clean the house (this one was taking longer, now that they were actually living in a house instead of a boiler room). Take a walk. Buy groceries. Lounge on the couch with Ben, reading or finding a new recipe or painting his nails. Walk to his AA meeting. Walk home. Make dinner. Eat with Diego. Watch TV or rent a movie. Say goodnight. Lay in bed. Write in his journal. Draw new pictures to make Diego smile at work. Go to sleep. 

Not every day had gone precisely like this, but pretty damn close, especially since he hit the 30 day mark and his withdrawal symptoms _finally_ seemed to be mostly memories. And even though Klaus knew exactly what was going to happen on Day 83, he still found himself looking forward to it. 

So it was in this way that Diego was able to surprise him, after writing a big pink 83 on a Tuesday underneath the cuddly kitten sitting in a basket. 

“You’re a week away from 90 days Klaus. That’s three months.”

Klaus paused, coffee pot in hand. They didn’t normally talk about the _almost_ marks...seemed too risky, like they were tempting fate. Better to take it ‘one day at a time.’

“I know you don’t really like to talk about important numbers coming up,” Diego said, as if reading Klaus’s mind. “But, I just...wanted to do something, nice…celebrate. If you want. I thought, maybe, we could umm...go out for dinner? Or something. If you want.”

Diego was looking down now, rolling the Sharpie back and forth between his hands as if it were the most interesting thing in the room. 

“Umm…uh…”

Conversations were normally so relaxed between them; Diego was certainly the easiest of his living siblings to talk to, the one Klaus felt the most comfortable with. But it was as if Diego’s uncertainty was rubbing off on Klaus, and he was uncharacteristically lost for words. 

“I mean, I only ask now b-b-because I didn’t...didn’t want you to feel...like, ambushed, or something, on the day. I-I know you like s-st-sticking to your routine….And plus, I wondered, I thought, maybe you’d rather, ya know, celebrate...with your friends, like from your meetings, instead.”

Klaus slowly turned to fully face Diego, but he was still holding the empty coffee pot, making him look (and feel) a bit awkward. His mouth was slightly parted and his breaths were quick and shallow. 

“Uh….yeah...I don’t---”

Diego shrunk into himself, eyes boring even further into the ground.

“We don’t have to...it was just--”

“No, umm, yeah...I want to...Sure...Yes.”

Diego finally stopped fiddling with the Sharpie and lifted his eyes to glance up at Klaus. 

“Yeah?” he asked shyly, and Klaus thought he could see a little sparkle in Diego’s eyes. Something he’d only caught a handful of times lately, usually when the two of them had been getting along particularly well. Klaus couldn’t really put his finger on what the sparkle meant, but it was almost, like...longing. Or maybe something...hopeful? 

“Yeah,” Klaus chuckled lightly, finally feeling a bit more like himself. He shook his head a little and gave Diego a smile. 

“Yeah, I’d really like that...celebrating...with you. Thanks Di.” 

Diego looked down again, and Klaus wouldn’t have believed it if he hadn’t seen it with his own two eyes, but it looked like Diego was...blushing. 

And smiling, definitely smiling. It started as just a little sideways grin, lips closed and eyes darting side to side. But as Klaus watched from where he stood at the counter, Diego shook his head a little and the smile grew, morphing into this wide-mouthed, toothy chuckle, like he was...giddy. It looked almost involuntary, like Diego couldn’t contain himself even if he tried. He looked up, giggling, and said,

“You haven’t called me that since we were kids...I didn’t realize I actually...miss it.” He scrunched his face up, looking embarrassed.

“Hmm...I guess you’re right, I haven’t...Me too, actually. I miss...calling you that.” He looked a little embarrassed too. 

They stood there, coffee pot and pink Sharpie in hand, smiles growing until they were both laughing, and got back to their routine of doing nice things for each other for the 83rd day in a row.


	4. Ben's Theory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben finally makes a real appearance, while Diego & Klaus talk dinner plans.

Klaus asked around that afternoon at his meeting about everyone’s availability next week. So at dinner he told Diego he  _ would _ actually like to celebrate with his AA friends on his 90th day sober, simply because they would all already be together at the meeting. Plus, Sarah worked at a mini-golf place on Tuesday nights, and she was pretty confident she could sneak at least some of them in for free. 

Just as Diego’s hopes were being crushed, Klaus suggested that maybe they could go out to dinner the night before. 

Relieved, Diego said, “Sure, that sounds like a great idea. I’ll look for a place.” 

Diego paused. “Unless, you have somewhere in mind, somewhere in particular you’d like to go?”

“Nah, I’m ok with whatever. You pick!” Klaus smiled before taking another bite of his veggie lasagna.

***************

Klaus had been nervous when Diego originally brought up the 90 day thing. He thought maybe he’d start to spin out of control or something, thinking about being sober for 7 days in a row. But actually, days 83 and 84 were a breeze. Nothing was out of the ordinary, and Klaus found himself simply looking forward to dinner with Diego. Until…

“I made us a reservation. For next Monday,” Diego said at dinner on day 84, obviously going for nonchalant, but landing closer to ‘ _ pretty fucking nervous.’ _

“Oh?” Klaus managed to squeak, before accidentally spitting out some sweet potato bits.    


“Yeah, I uh, I drove around on my lunch hour today, to look at a few places, ya know? And I think, I think you’ll like this one. The menu, it looked like, like there were some things you might enjoy.”

“Diego drove around to look at restaurants on his lunch break? To find a menu you would like?” Ben asked incredulously, apparently reading Klaus’s mind. 

“Oh,” Klaus replied, at a loss for words.

Diego tried to fill the silence. "Yeah, I know you've been trying to eat healthy, like, to be more, in control, of what you put in your body, now that you're sober." Diego was fidgeting. "Like, more vegetables and stuff...You're getting really good at cooking new things by the way." He looked up and gave Klaus a nervous smile. "It's really good," he said, gesturing to his plate with his fork. "Anyway, this place, has like, interesting vegetable dishes, and stuff." 

Ben spoke before Klaus could. "Diego has noticed your eating habits, and what helps you stay sober, and complimented your cooking, and looked for ' _interesting vegetable dishes?'_ The pitch of Ben's voice rose with each question, mimicking the voice in Klaus's own mind. 

"Oh," Klaus said again, adding, "Thanks," and returning the nervous smile. 

“Umm, well, the place, it’s a little fancy...I hope it’s not too fancy,” Diego said quickly, using his fork to push the sweet potatoes around on his plate. 

“Oh,” Klaus said, _again_. 

“Uh, ya think you could say something besides ‘Oh’ for once?” Ben asked, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Uh, _yeah_ ,” Klaus replied in his best high school cheerleader voice. But then, realizing his tone was off for this whole Diego situation, he added softly, “Yeah, that sounds, great. Fancy...I like fancy.” 

“Yeah?” 

Klaus nodded, smiling, and Diego’s eyes suddenly lit up. “Oh! I forgot to tell you the best part. It’s a dry restaurant," Diego said proudly.

“What?” Ben and Klaus asked at the same time, confused. 

“Ya know, they don’t sell any alcohol. Like, so you won't be, ya know, tempted, or whatever." 

“Oh,” Klaus replied again, seemingly only able to respond with that one word this evening. “Wow, Diego, that’s so…”

“Thoughtful?” Ben provided. 

“Thoughtful,” Klaus repeated, nodding his appreciation. 

“Oh, yeah, well it’s a whole new thing. Michael, from work, he suggested it when I told him we were going out.” Diego looked down at his plate again, face blushing. 

“Why is he blushing again? What is his deal lately?” Ben asked, while Klaus just stared at Diego, mouth open, unchewed food waiting patiently. 

“You told Michael we were going out?” Klaus finally asked, not entirely sure why that mattered. 

“I mean, not like,  _ going out _ , but like, to dinner, I mean. I just, asked him for some suggestions. Like, for a nice place, is all.”

“Oh” said Klaus, _for the thousandth time_ , considering what this all might mean. 

"Anyway, yeah, I just thought, maybe, a dry restaurant would be...easier, for the first time we go out.” 

Klaus raised his eyebrows. "The _first_ time we go out? Are you already propositioning me for a _second_ time?"

"What? No! I just, I mean, ya know. I mean, we might go out to eat again sometime. In the future, sometime. Sure, if you want." Klaus would've thought Diego's face couldn't get any redder after the Michael comment, but he would've been wrong. 

"Relax Diego, yes, I'm sure we will. Sometime...I'm sure I'd like that." 

They were both starting to relax, if only a little bit, when Klaus added,

“Well, yeah. Anyway, that was really sweet of you. Ya know, to like, go out of your way...to ask around, and drive around, and, find somewhere...nice.” He smiled. “Thanks Di.” 

Diego was still moving his sweet potatoes around with extreme concentration, as if he was setting up his side of a Battleship game board. But when Klaus used his old nickname, he finally took a bite, and smiled back. 

*************

Ben kept quiet through the rest of the meal, moving to the living room and pretending to read, but actually eavesdropping on their whole _incredibly_ awkward conversation. 

Tonight just gave him more fuel for his most recent hypothesis, but he still wasn’t totally convinced. I mean, if he hadn’t seen these two socially inept dweebs interacting over the past 3 months, he never would’ve believed it himself. 

If Klaus suspects anything, he hasn’t mentioned it to Ben. And Ben certainly hasn’t told Klaus about his little theory. 

Because Ben already  _ knows _ how Klaus feels; Ben has watched Klaus pine after, flirt with, casually woo, and have sex with hundreds of men over the years. And although Klaus isn’t quite as bold without the drugs, he still has some telltale signs: the stammering and speechlessness mean he’s very nervous, the grateful attitude and extreme thoughtfulness for Diego's comfort and health mean he’s trying to make a good impression, and the staying sober means he wants this to actually _mean_ something and he wants it to last. 

So yeah, Ben  _ knows _ how Klaus feels--he’s hopelessly in love with Diego. He just for some reason hasn’t told Ben yet. 

And the real kicker, the part Ben never would have totally believed until tonight, is that he’s pretty sure Diego’s in love with Klaus too. 


	5. It sparkles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben helps Klaus before his dinner celebration.

Klaus was on the couch, painting his nails, with Ben sprawled out next to him, staring at the wall. Diego was at work, and Klaus was recounting the end of last night’s dinner conversation, both of them pretending like Ben hadn’t been eavesdropping. But Klaus needed a way to calm his nerves about the whole situation.

Sure, Diego and Klaus had been out to eat together before. They went to Griddy’s for donuts and coffee some weekend mornings, since Diego didn’t usually have to work. Diego knew that threw off Klaus’s whole routine, and he kept telling Klaus he wanted to give him a way to ‘stay busy.’

They mostly went to Griddy’s for the nostalgia. It was, after all, one of the few untainted memories of their childhood. It was especially nice to be there with someone who remembered all the times they snuck there as kids to buy a donut or hot chocolate with the coins they had found on the street and had been pooling together for months. They’d reminisce about the time Allison freaked out when no one told her she had chocolate icing on her teeth before some fan took a photo with her in the booth by the door, or about Five teleporting into the _women’s_ restroom by mistake, and totally freaking out that little old lady.

There had also been the rare occasion when Klaus had run out of time to get groceries, or his AA meeting ran long and he got home too late to cook. Those nights they’d go to some fast food burger joint, then drive to a lookout point and eat in the car, looking down on the city below. Or they’d walk to the taco truck over on Grand, and sit on top of the picnic tables in Center Park, looking up at the stars. Or they would order in a pizza, watch a movie, share a bowl of popcorn, fall asleep on the couch. 

When Diego had suggested going out to celebrate, Klaus had envisioned one of those scenarios; those nights all seemed special, each in their own way. But they’d certainly never been to a _fancy_ restaurant together. Klaus actually couldn’t remember going to a fancy restaurant _ever_ , and Ben has confirmed that to be true. 

“Unless you count that guy, what was his name? Derek? Or was it Darren? Ya know, the sweet one who took you to Applebee’s every Tuesday night for half-priced appetizers.” Ben rubbed his chin pensively, trying to remember the guy's name. 

“Ahh, yes. The quiet one, who always wore that blue hoodie. Gee, I loved those mozzarella sticks,” Klaus reminisced, looking up airily at the ceiling. 

“Something tells me there won’t be cheese sticks on the menu at _Dry Creek Steakhouse_ ,” Ben said haughtily. “And don’t wear a hoodie either!”

Klaus grasped his chest and gasped, mocking offense. “How dare you? The most fashionable person in this family would not be caught dead in a hoodie.” 

Ben rolled his eyes. “You really gotta stop using dead jokes.” 

“Sorry,” Klaus pouted. 

“But seriously, what are you going to wear?” Ben asked.

“Hmm, well I hadn’t really thought about it, beyond this new dark purple nail polish.” Klaus held up his hands to show Ben. “It sparkles!” He wiggled his fingers to give the full effect. 

“As much as I’m sure Diego will love your sparkly new nail polish, I think he’ll want you to wear a little more than that.” Klaus chuckled, and Ben added, “at least for the dinner portion of your date.” 

Klaus’s hands dropped as fast as his jaw. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Klaus,” Ben warned, as if he was shocked that Klaus even had to ask. 

“What? Diego wants me to keep my clothes on for the _whole_ date…And this isn’t a date! It’s a celebration dinner. Geez!” Klaus huffed.

“Are you kidding? It’s a dinner that Diego planned for you a week in advance, with a reservation, at a fancy restaurant, that doesn’t serve alcohol, to celebrate how good you’re doing, perfectly designed with your tastes in mind. God, he even asked his work friends for advice about it Klaus!” Ben was sitting up now, looking at Klaus in disbelief.

Klaus took a breath in, as if to give a rebuttal, but then didn’t. He paused, tilting his head. “Yeah, that was weird, right?”

“Yeah, like I said, it’s a date.”

“It’s not a date if it’s with your brother.” Klaus said, trying to sound casual, but knowing he couldn’t slip one past his brother. _This_ brother. 

“Klaus,” Ben said, softer this time. “Do you want it to be a date?”

“What? No!” He looked up nervously at Ben. They stared at each other, Klaus’s eyes growing more and more anxious, while Ben’s grew more and more patient. 

“Klaus, it’s ok if you do,” Ben said gently, scooting closer to Klaus on the couch. 

“Ben, he’s my _brother_. That’s pretty fucked up, even for me.” 

“Hey, Luther and Allison went for it, and they're way less fucked up than you.”

Klaus grimaced. “Yeah, that's true. But we were kids. They were hiding in the attic to hold hands and give each other love notes and trinkets. It’s different now, we’re adults. We could…” he drifted off, looking down toward the floor. 

Ben laughed. “You’re thinking about fucking Diego, aren’t you?” he accused. 

“God! No! Ben, Jesus!” Klaus’s faced hardened in disgust, then quickly softened. “I _was_ thinking about kissing him though. God, and he does look _totally_ fuckable in those new pants he got last week. Jesus Christ, _what is wrong with me_?!”

Ben laughed, gently. “Klaus, I think you have feelings for Diego. Like, serious feelings.”

Klaus rested his elbows on his knees, and his face in his hands, looking guilty and defeated. 

Ben added, “If it makes you feel better, I think Diego has feelings for you too.” 

Klaus looked up. “What makes you think that?” he asked quickly. 

“Think about it. You two have always been close, even when we were little.” Klaus nodded. “You were always Diego’s favorite, everyone knew that.” Klaus smiled giving a half-assed sitting curtsy. 

“Plus, think of all the shit you’ve done to him since you left home. You might not remember all of it Klaus, but you were a total dick to him for like, 8 years straight; I saw it all.” Klaus grimaced; he hated thinking about the shit he’s put people through, especially Diego. 

“But he’s still here for you, every time you need help. He’s never even asked you to apologize for Christ’s sake. And God, lately, with the blushing, and the stammering, and the super extra nice things he’s doing. Klaus, he _quit his job_ to help you get sober. And then found a new one, that he doesn’t like as much. And that calendar?!”

Klaus nodded again, huffing out a little breath. 

Ben continued. “Also, he _left his apartment_ , where he had lived happily for several years, _so you could have a bathtub._ And he found a brand new apartment, where he pays all the bills, and spends every moment of his free time with you, doing like, absolutely nothing, and you’re both so fucking happy about it, all the goddamn time!”

…

…

“Oh my God.” Klaus gasped, as Ben huffed breathlessly, even though he didn’t actually need to breathe. 

“I’m in love with Diego.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to those of you who are actually following this & are anxiously awaiting their dinner. I know I keep saying it will happen in the next chapter but my adhd brain just can't make it there yet. I have a few more ideas for leading up to the dinner, but it's coming soon I promise!


	6. Not the Weirdest Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus and Benny have a sweet little chat.

“Are you honestly just now realizing that?” Ben asked suspiciously. 

“That I’m in love with Diego?! Uh,  _ yeah  _ Ben,” Klaus's high pitched laughter gave away how nervous he really was. 

“Well, it’s just a relief is all. I was starting to worry that you were trying to keep it a secret from me,” Ben admitted, feeling embarrassed. 

Klaus finally looked up. “What? Benny,” Klaus laughed sweetly, “why would I keep that from you?  _ How _ could I keep that from you? You literally know every single thing about my sad little life.” 

“Hey! Don’t do that.” Ben frowned. "You're not supposed to be doing that anymore."

“What?” Klaus asked. 

“Don’t put yourself down like that.” Klaus looked away. “Your life is good. This life that  _ you _ have made for yourself, here,  _ with Diego,  _ sober...This is nice.”

“I know,” Klaus sighed. “I’m still just getting used to that idea I guess…”

“Thanks Benny.” He looked up, smiling weakly at his dead brother, who smiled right back. 

“Anyway, how did you know? That I---about Diego? Before I even did?!” Klaus laughed in disbelief. 

Ben laughed too. “Well you’re not exactly a closed book Klaus. All of this nervous energy you have when he’s around, like you can’t think of what to say. When are you ever speechless?! And you’re doing all this nice shit for him all the time, like cooking and cleaning and running errands, like you want him to be so proud of you or something. And oh my God, doodling those little pictures that you pack in his lunch? Come on, Klaus. How did you  _ not _ know?”

Klaus sat there, speechless. “You’re right,” he finally said. “I can’t believe I didn’t realize it.” He looked down, picking at the dried nail polish on his skin so it would look a little neater. “It’s just, kinda weird, don’t ya think? To… _ love _ your own brother?” He looked nervously at Ben.

“I mean, yeah. But you’re pretty weird in just about every way a person can be.” 

“Gee, thanks Benny. Way to make a guy feel good about himself,” Klaus remarked sarcastically.

“Klaus, there is absolutely no denying the fact that you're unconventional in every possible way. And you know I mean that as a total compliment. You’re weird...And, so is Diego....to be honest, it’s not even the weirdest thing about the two of you.”

He pondered that for a moment. 

“Klaus, you’re talking to your dead brother who’s been following you around from the afterlife for the past eight years.”

“Who was spontaneously born on the exact same day, at the exact same time, as you and your other five adopted siblings, along with 36 other babies, all around the world, to a bunch of poor, unsuspecting women who weren’t even pregnant five minutes before our arrival.”

“Diego can hold his breath indefinitely...and throw things in ways that defy the laws of physics.”

“You both spent your childhood wearing superhero masks and fighting bad guys.”

“Your mom is a robot.” 

“Your butler is a talking chimpanzee.”

Klaus lifted his eyebrows a little higher after each point, then finally shrugged and nodded in agreement. 

“I’d say a little love between brothers isn’t gonna tip the scale toward weird much further than it already is,” Ben added, earning a little smile from Klaus.

“Thanks Benny...Man, what am I gonna do? I don’t know if I can tell him. What if you’re wrong? What if he just loves me like a normal person loves their brother?”

“I’m not wrong.”

“Yeah yeah,” Klaus says, dismissing Ben with a wave of his hand. “But what if you are? What if I tell Diego I love him and he’s totally creeped out and he makes me move out and I have no job and no skills and no house and no one to help me stay sober and no one who cares about me?!”

“Hey!” Ben shouts, offended. 

“Sorry, sorry! No one  _ living _ who cares about me...And it’s hard to help someone as slippery as me stay sober if you can’t touch anything!” Klaus shouts. 

Then softer, “But you  _ know _ I appreciate all of your efforts Benny. We both know I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you.” They smiled at each other. 

Ben was the first to break the silence of the moment. “Klaus, I  _ know  _ I’m not wrong. But on the off chance that I am, it won’t matter. Diego  _ loves  _ you. That part’s for sure. After all the things you’ve done to him, said to him, in the past eight years, I honestly think there’s nothing you could do that would make Diego give up on you. Even if you tell him, and he doesn’t feel it too, he’s not gonna just kick you out. He knows how hard you’ve been working; he wouldn’t just give up on all that, just to feel a little less awkward for a few days. He’d never leave you high and dry like that.”

“Maybe...but what if it ruins our...friendship. Relationship?...Feelings...for each other? What if...he doesn’t wanna be my best friend anymore?” Klaus asked nervously. 

Ben shot him a dirty look, and Klaus added, “Living! My best  _ living _ friend!” 

“Well, honestly, I don’t think that will happen. But, if it does, you’ll still have your best  _ dead _ friend right here.” 

Klaus smiled. “I wish I could hug you.”

Ben looked down, letting his hand fall through Klaus’s hand on the couch, then looked back up and smiled, sadly. 

“Me too.”


	7. Notes Left Unseen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus falls back into old habits.

Klaus decided if he really was going on a _date_ , he needed a new outfit. Especially since the man who had set up the date had seen him wear all six of the outfits he owned every day for the past 86 days. 

With no money to speak of, Klaus fell back into old habits…

He raided Allison’s closet. 

He wasn’t alone this time, which was a nice change. He only had the guts to go into that creepy old mansion because he somehow managed to convince Ben he needed a lookout, in order to avoid having a chat with dear old dad. 

Honestly, he’s mostly just nervous. He hasn’t set foot here since he ran away eight years ago. He’s not totally sure what to expect. 

He miraculously makes it through the back door and up to Allison’s room without being spotted. He tries on a bunch of skirts, but decides to stick with his classic black skinny jeans, which could maybe pass for dressy, with the right top. A fancy restaurant will almost certainly be filled with conservative rich folks who surely won’t be able to resist pointing out to Klaus that he’s a man, as if he’d forgotten. _‘Men don’t wear skirts,’_ some asswipe would undoubtedly inform him, as if Klaus is just now learning all the ridiculous societal constructs.

He would normally pay no mind to such frivolous comments, but he had big plans for dinner, and he didn’t want anything to get in the way. 

That doesn’t stop him from throwing a few of the best-looking skirts into the trash bag he brought with him; he was excited to fill his new closet.

He thought about trying on some of Allison’s pants, but knows he won’t be able to fill them out in any of the right places. Maybe he’ll try Vanya’s closet on the way out, find a nice short pair of trousers he can pull off as ankle pants. 

In the meantime, he tries on every top he can find, throwing some into his makeshift suitcase, before settling on a flowy, button-up lavender floral print, just sheer enough for Klaus to love. In the spirit of not making any waves at the fancy restaurant, Klaus makes a mental note to find an undershirt in Vanya’s closet as well. Unless he wants to find a bra and stuff it with Kleenex, Allison’s tank tops will all be too big. 

Before leaving his sister’s room, he sits at her vanity, and slowly looks himself over in the mirror. Ben is still in the hall, making sure no one finds him snooping through Allison’s stuff. He opens her top right drawer, and rummages through the makeup he knew he’d find there. 

He pulls out the tube of lip gloss that’s sitting on top, away from the others, and dabs it onto his lips. He can still taste the fake watermelon flavor after all these years, and remembers the exact day he stole it from the mall. He gave it to Allison as a gift, a thank you. 

Klaus had been too nervous to tell anyone after all the teasing he’d received for the high heels incident, but he’d been watching Allison’s new-found love for makeup from afar. She caught Klaus watching her apply her makeup one day, while sitting at this very vanity. Instead of telling him to go away, or yelling for the others to come and tease him about it, she just asked him if he wanted to join her. 

She didn’t teach him everything he knows, but she did teach him the basics. And after that day, he realized, not _everyone_ would make fun of him for liking makeup, or fancy clothes. That gave him the confidence boost he needed to wear what he liked, on his face and the rest of his body. 

He smiled at the sweet memory--a sister, helping her brother realize he can be whoever he wants. That was the day he was able to truly become himself. 

He places the watermelon lip gloss back in its designated space, not wanting to deprive Allison of this nostalgia, were she ever to find herself back in this room. He takes a different tube instead, along with some eyeshadow and his trusty favorite--eyeliner. 

Since he’s gotten sober, he hasn’t really needed to get dressed up. He mostly just wears a bunch of Diego’s old T-shirts and gym shorts. They did go to the mall together so Klaus could pick out a few pairs of pants, but nothing fancy. He didn’t have any makeup with him when he came to Diego’s boiler room three months ago, and he hasn’t had the money or the desire to buy any. But now, makeup and clothes bundled up together in his trusty trash bag, he’s excited to feel a little more like himself. 

He gets up to leave, but thinks better of it. He sits back down, rummaging for something to write on, and finds an old receipt. He can’t find a pen, so he awkwardly scrolls on it, using the eyeliner pencil. 

_A,_

_I borrowed a few things from your closet. I have a date! Hope I get a chance to tell you about it soon. Love you,_

_K_

He knows she won’t see it, but at least he tried. He didn’t realize until he got here, but he misses her. Misses all of them. 

At least he still has Diego. And Ben--he'll always have Ben.

He hopes he _still_ has Diego three nights from now. 

Ben is still in the hall keeping watch when Klaus comes out triumphantly, trash bag in hand. 

Against his better judgment, he decides to walk across the hall. He peeks in Diego’s room, but closes the door quickly, knowing he behaves better without temptation. 

Next he cracks open his door, slowly, as if something might jump out at him. He hated this room so much growing up--so many ghosts following him in here after dark. 

At least his fairy lights were still hanging above the bed; he had Diego to thank for that. Bedtime became so much easier once Diego had hung them up. Klaus swears Ben can hear his thoughts as he gives him a knowing smile before heading back into the hall to give him some privacy. 

He can’t believe it, but everything looks exactly the same as the day he left. Except…

He walks to the desk, and opens a faded piece of paper with his name on the front. 

_Klaus,_

_I guess you probably won’t see this._

_I’ve been waiting for you to come home for almost a year, but I can’t stay here anymore. Not without you. And Ben._

_I’ve been looking for you. Sometimes, at night. I sneak out, like you used to do, and I imagine where you might have gone back then, where you might be now._

_I come home and sleep in your bed, in case you come back for something._

_I hope you’re safe. I hope you’re happy._

_Mom says you miss us, just like we miss you. She says you’re happier out there, because there aren’t as many ghosts._

_I hope that’s true. I hope you can find out how to keep them away, without the drugs._

_I don’t know where I’m going, but I need to get away from here. From Dad, from Luther, from this place, these memories. Everything here reminds me of you._

_I miss you. I wish I could see you one more time before I go. I wish I could have said goodbye. I wish you would have taken me with you._

_I hope I see you again._

_If I do, I promise I’ll try harder._

_I love you._

_Di_

Klaus wipes tears from his cheeks as he reads it again. And again. 

Finally Ben’s there, asking if he’s ok, and then reading over his shoulder. Klaus swears he hears Ben sniffling before he says, in a sad, weepy voice:

“I told you.”


	8. Emotional Roller Coaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is finally date night, and Ben helps Klaus get ready.

Day 89. Finally. 

Klaus had been on an emotional roller coaster this week, and his nerves were getting the best of him. 

They had somehow managed to keep up their routine, but Klaus could feel himself acting weird around Diego. He wanted to bring up the note, but how could he? The guilt, the hurt, the sadness, the memories--it would ruin their date. 

If it really was a date. 

Which, after Ben’s convincing, and especially after finding that letter, he’s pretty sure it is. 

He just kept thinking, _‘Why didn’t Diego tell me sooner?’_

“Because you were high, or drunk, or both,” Ben eloquently reminded him. 

“Don’t feel guilty, that won’t help,” Ben chided from the toilet seat, as Klaus pouted in front of the bathroom mirror. 

“He’s going to tell you now. You’re sober, and he’s taking you on a date. This is his big moment. Just wait for it,” Ben reassured him.

Klaus had originally planned on telling Diego himself--that he...loved him. That he was _in love_ with him. Ever since he’d come to that realization himself (thanks Benny). 

How could he not tell someone he loved them? 

He had planned on doing it at dinner, but then he found the note. 

Diego had apparently not been telling Klaus he loved him for years. 

Klaus was trying not to think of that right now though, because he had some primping to do. He’d already showered, brushed & flossed his teeth, and moisturized, and was leaving the bathroom to get dressed when he almost ran right into Diego in the hall. 

They both stopped, staring at each other, mouths open. 

“Oh,” they said in unison.

“You’re home early,” Klaus finally replied.

Diego was staring at Klaus’s bare torso, and then his eyes moved lower, to the towel hanging low around his hips. 

“Huh? Oh, right, yeah. I...came home early. To get ready. For our...dinner. Like, to shower, and stuff.” 

“Oh,” Klaus said again. 

“Michael said he’d cover for me, so I could, ya know, get ready.” Diego flushed, eyes darting to Klaus’s face as he suddenly realized he had been staring at Klaus’s naked stomach for far too long.

“Oh,” Klaus said, _again_. 

“Well I’ll just be in my room. Getting ready...See ya soon!” Klaus held up his Goodbye hand and quickly rushed into his room. As soon as he was in, he closed the door and leaned back on it, palming his forehead in frustration. 

“There you go, with the ‘oh’s’ again,” Ben teased. 

“Shut up Ben. I need to concentrate.”

He was glad he had decided to go back for Allison’s small vanity mirror the other day. With Diego home so much earlier than he’d expected, he would have to do his makeup in his bedroom. 

When he was finally dressed and ready, he still had ten minutes to spare before they had to leave. He checked himself in the full-length closet mirror one last time. 

Vanya’s tight black dress pants made his ass look great, and were much fancier than his skinny jeans. They also showed off a bit of his ankles, which Klaus was quite proud of, thank you very much. He had found his old black dress shoes in his closet at the Academy; they were a bit snug, but looked perfect without socks under the short pants. Allison’s floral top actually looked even better with a plain white T-shirt of Vanya’s underneath. Though it looked like more of a crop top on Klaus, leaving a narrow strip of bare skin above his pants peeking through the sheer lavender fabric. His nail polish matched the dark purple and black flowers of his new blouse, and his dark-lined eyes stood out dramatically above his shiny lips.

“Perfect,” Ben said with a smile, as he gave Klaus a thumbs up toward their reflection in the mirror. 

Satisfied, Klaus smiled back at Ben, then pointed to his brother’s reflection in the mirror. 

“Remember, one cough for leave, two coughs for stay.” 

Ben chuckled as he recalled their old signal; they hadn’t had to use it in awhile. 

“Sure thing, lovebird,” Ben winked. 

“I’m serious Ben, _please_ don’t leave unless I ask you to. I’m nervous, I _need you_.” 

Ben winced. 

“What if I can’t think of what to say?” Klaus added quickly, trying to cover the accidental slip of the double meaning hidden in those words.

Ben sighed. “I know, I know. I already promised you I’d stay. Klaus, look at me.”

“I _am_ looking at you!” Klaus whined into the mirror. 

“No,” Ben remarked softly. “ _Turn around_ and look at me.”

Klaus huffed and turned to face his brother. Ben stepped forward, and tenderly placed his hands on, and maybe a little _through_ , Klaus’s cheeks. They both closed their eyes and took a deep breath, as Klaus felt Ben’s chill seeping all over his face, and Ben felt Klaus’s warmth melting into his hands. 

“Klaus,” Ben whispered, as Klaus moved his face back and forth between Ben’s hands, desperately trying, and failing, to feel _more_. 

“Hey, Klausie,” Ben tried again, this time a bit louder, but still soft. Klaus stilled, took a breath, and opened his eyes.

Ben brought their foreheads together, just like he used to, this time without the physical touch, and looked into Klaus’s eyes. 

“You’ll be fine. You’ll be great. Just, be...you. Be yourself...”

“You’re perfect,” he added quietly, and they both closed their eyes. 

“Benny,” Klaus whined sadly, a single tear dripping down his cheek. 

They hadn’t done this in years--talked about it. They both wondered if it might happen the other day, when Klaus kept going on and on about how weird it was to love your brother, but they both managed to behave. They just found it was easier to forget, move on. They knew nothing could come of it. 

They hadn’t even done anything, they were only kids. They just snuck into each other’s rooms some nights to whisper and giggle under the sheets. They both liked the way it made them forget--about their awful father, their awful circumstances, their awful powers. 

Sometimes they’d scoot closer so they could talk even quieter, and they would get so close their foreheads would touch, never anything more. 

But they had both known, somehow, that something was _going_ to happen. 

_Could have_ happened. _Would have_ happened...

If Ben hadn’t died. 

But Ben _did_ die, and Klaus _almost_ died, from the grief. And then later, from the drugs he used to help him forget about the grief. 

And so they agreed, a long time ago, that they wouldn’t bring it up. It was just too painful, for both of them. 

But here was Ben, using his special nickname and touching their foreheads together and calling Klaus perfect. 

“I know, I know,” Ben said softly. “I’m not talking about it.”

Klaus sniffled.

“I just wanted you to remember. Not, about...us. I swear, I’m not trying to be selfish. I...I know you love Diego, and he loves you, and I really am happy for both of you. You guys’ll be great. It’s just, I just wanted you to remember that you, you don’t have to be nervous...you _are_ perfect...and Diego’s not the only one who thinks so.” Ben’s eyes were still closed, and their foreheads were still as close to touching as they would ever get.

“I miss you,” Klaus whispered, holding back more tears. 

Ben nodded. “I know...me too.”

They stayed that way--eyes closed, foreheads not quite touching, Ben’s hands not quite cupping Klaus’s cheeks--until it was time to go. 

They both looked up, and opened their eyes, and slowly moved their heads away. 

Klaus turned back around to face the mirror. “You ruined my makeup,” he said, smiling sadly at Ben through the mirror. 

“You still look great,” Ben smiled back, as Klaus wiped his cheeks and fixed his eyeliner. 

He opened the door, and then stopped. 

“Hey, Benny,” Klaus whispered over his shoulder, not wanting Diego to hear. “I know we said we’d never talk about it. But, I’d like to, sometime, if you want. Now that I’m...ya know.” 

“Yeah, I know. Me too. Just not tonight, ok? You’re supposed to be thinking about your date with Diego.”

“I know, I am!” Klaus whispered, a little too loudly. Then added, softer, “But that doesn’t really change how I feel about you.” 

Ben sighed, and smiled. “It can ya know? I wouldn’t mind.” 

“I know you wouldn’t Benny,” Klaus laughed sweetly, sadly, “but it won’t.”

He took a deep breath, smiled back at Ben, and left his room. He composed himself in the hall, and walked into the kitchen only to stop, staring at the kitchen table. Diego was standing off to the side at the sink, with a glass of water in his hand. 

“Oh,” they said in unison, _again_. 

Klaus eventually turned his head away from the table to look at Diego.

“Klaus,” Diego finally said, a little too breathy. 

“You look...so...pretty.” Diego sounded mesmerized.

Klaus looked down at himself, and then back up at Diego, and somehow couldn’t think of what to say. 

“Thanks,” Ben supplied. 

“Thanks,” Klaus repeated, flashing a tiny smile meant for both of his brothers. 

He took a moment to gather his thoughts.

“You look great too. Handsome.” Klaus smiled. “I’ve never really soon you, like this.” He gestured up and down over Diego’s outfit. 

It was simple--black dress pants, black shoes, black blazer, white shirt. The top two buttons were undone, revealing more of Diego’s beautifully olive-colored chest than Klaus was used to seeing. He couldn’t look away. 

“Oh, thanks. Yeah, I didn’t know...I thought maybe this was...too much?”

…

“What do you think?” He set the glass of water down so he could button the lower of the two back up, but Klaus stepped forward, grabbing Diego’s hands to push them away from his shirt, and unbuttoning it again. 

“No, it’s...it’s perfect,” Klaus said dreamily, reiterating Ben’s words from earlier. 

They both looked down at Diego’s chest; Klaus’s hands were still resting on Diego’s pecs, fingers clutching each side of his shirt collar. He panicked and started to pull away, but Diego’s hands shot up, grasping Klaus’s in his own. Klaus gasped, as Diego’s thumbs rubbed gentle circles into Klaus’s palms. 

A wave of electricity shot through Klaus’s body, and he shivered visibly under Diego’s touch. He felt his eyelids closing against his will, when Diego whispered, “Klaus.”

He opened his eyes to see Diego staring at him, pupils wide. His breathing was labored, but Diego shook his head, seemingly trying to concentrate. 

“Klaus,” he started again, taking a small step back, but leaving their hands intertwined. “I got you these...flowers.” He looked away, gesturing toward the vase. 

Klaus had forgotten all about them, too distracted by Diego’s kind words and gorgeous body to remember his initial surprise upon seeing them on the table when he walked in. 

Diego stepped away now, slowly dropping their hands, and Klaus _almost_ whimpered at the loss of his touch. Diego picked up the glass, walked to the table, and poured the water into the clear vase. It held a beautiful bouquet of different colored flowers--pinks and yellows, purples and whites, with little bits of greenery spread throughout.

He scrunched his nose. “Is it too much? I felt kind of...silly, buying them. I just, thought--”

“They’re beautiful,” Klaus interrupted, walking quietly to the table, closing his eyes to smell the bouquet, and caressing a few petals.

He slowly dropped his hand from the flowers and reached for Diego’s. Klaus slipped his fingers into Diego’s palm and brought both of their hands toward his face. “I love them,” he said, before gently kissing the back of Diego’s hand. 

“Thanks Di,” he breathed, before kissing him again, even softer, this time on the backs of his fingertips, just above Diego’s perfectly trimmed nails. 

“Oh...oh, you’re welcome.” Diego smiled, obviously flustered.

There was barely any resistance as Diego pulled his hand from his brother’s grip to caress his thumb across Klaus’s jawline and his fingertips across Klaus’s cheek. 

Klaus leaned his head into the touch, closing his eyes and basking in the feeling of goosebumps forming under Diego’s calloused fingers, while also remembering the similar, chillier touch Ben had provided earlier. 

Klaus opened his eyes and looked past Diego, to see Ben standing in the corner, looking down at his feet. He looked sad, rejected, defeated. 

“Shit,” Klaus said aloud. Diego pulled his hand away immediately, and Ben’s eyes shot up, meeting Klaus’s gaze.

“Shit,” Klaus said again, realizing he’d accidentally said that out loud, and that Ben had caught him staring. 

“What’s wrong?” they both asked in unison. 

“Nothing!” Klaus almost shouted. “Nothing, I just...forgot something in my room. _Diego_ , can you wait here while I run to grab it?” Klaus shot a look into the corner, hoping Ben would follow him. 

“Uh, sure,” Diego said, stepping away nervously and scratching the back of his neck. 

Klaus ran through the hall and to his room. Ben was there the second he closed the door. 

“What the hell was that?!” Ben shouted. 

“Ben,” Klaus whispered, “don’t take this the wrong way, but you gotta stay here. Not because I don’t want you there Benny! Please know that I do. I don’t want to go anywhere without you. I just...I think it’s gonna be really hard for me to act normal. When he was touching my face just now...I was thinking about you! I mean, I was thinking about him too, it was weird. I know this is weird. And sad. I know you’re sad. I’m sad too. But I think, I gotta figure this out, by myself. Just tonight. I know that’s asking a lot from you, please don’t be mad.” Klaus was whispering, and begging, and he looked like he was about to cry. 

“You’re right. Of course you’re right. I made it weird. I’m sorry Klaus.” Ben looked away.

“No,” Klaus whispered tenderly, reaching for Ben’s hand. Their hands met, as close as they could, and Klaus sighed. 

“No, Benny. This isn’t your fault. It’s already weird. Everything about this is weird. But you certainly didn’t make it any weirder.” Klaus took a step closer, bending down to meet Ben’s gaze. “Listen, Benny, I know we said we wouldn’t talk about it, but…” He took a breath. “I love you.” Ben looked up. 

“I know we just had this long talk about how I love Diego, and I do. But I love you too. And I always will, and nothing will ever change that.”

“I just have to figure out a way to tell Diego.”

“You can NOT tell Diego!” Ben shouted, standing up taller now. “You’ll mess it all up!” Ben ripped his hand away from Klaus. 

“You don’t know that,” Klaus whisper shouted. “Maybe--maybe--well, I don’t know, but I’m sure I can work it out. You said just the other day we should tell him that you’re here, remember?” 

“That was before I knew that he was in love with you! Or that I was still in love with you too! Or that you were in love with...both of us!

“Yeah, I know, it certainly does make things more confusing, doesn’t it? But I _am_ gonna find a way to tell him. About everything. Because he deserves to know, and you deserve to be heard _and_ loved, and I deserve to stop having to keep all these secrets!”

Ben looked away, crossing his arms and pouting silently, as if his teenage body had won the battle against his 25-year-old-brain. 

“Ben?” Klaus asked, when Ben didn’t say anything.

“Ben? Will you be here when I get back? We can talk about all this, I promise.”

Ben’s face softened, and nodded, without ever looking up at Klaus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not see this coming. Sorry for the angst!


	9. What Sounds Good to You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They finally make it to dinner.

They’d walked about three blocks, when Klaus decided it was time to clear the air. It was obvious he had freaked Diego out. It’s not every day Diego caresses his brother’s face, and screaming and running from the room was probably not the reaction he was looking for. 

“Hey, Di?” he asked, still walking slowly, but turning toward his brother.

“Hmm?” 

“I’m sorry about earlier, at the apartment. I just, got a little nervous. Sorry.”

“Hey, no, you don’t need to apologize. I shouldn’t have--”

“No,” Klaus grabbed Diego’s elbow, stopping him and pulling him closer. “No, you were perfect,” Klaus said, reassuringly. 

Their eyes met, and Diego’s flashed confusion, uncertainty, and hope all in the span of a second. 

“Yeah?” he asked timidly, searching Klaus’s eyes for an answer.

Klaus looked down, grabbed Diego’s hand in his own, and started walking again.

“Yeah,” he smiled, and they walked hand in hand toward the restaurant, both men grinning the rest of the way. 

*******

By the time their drinks arrived, Klaus was already super impressed by this whole dry restaurant concept. There was, by definition, no alcohol, but their drink menu was huge, providing so many options for someone who may feel more comfortable with a drink in their hand at dinner. Sparkling punches and ciders, mocktails, smoothies, sodas, hot tea, and on and on. Klaus went with the sparkling pear punch, and Diego decided on a strawberry mango smoothie. 

Now they were looking at the menu, and Diego was right--there were several ‘interesting vegetable dishes,’ as promised. They decided to order from the small plates menu, so they could each try a larger variety. The waitress recommended picking five or six items, but everything sounded so tasty, it was hard to choose. 

“What sounds good to you?” Diego asked, after browsing the menu for a few minutes. 

“Hmm...honestly, everything,” Klaus laughed. 

“Good, you pick then.” 

“Don’t you want to choose a few?” Klaus asked, looking up from his menu.

“Nah, I’m sure I’ll like whatever you pick. You’re better at this stuff than me. And besides, it’s your special day--I want you to be able to get...everything you want.” Diego smiled hesitantly, looking down at his hands, which were suddenly fidgeting on the table.

Klaus set down his menu, took a deep breath, and reached for Diego’s hands with both of his own. Diego inhaled quickly and stilled his hands, which were now resting under Klaus’s. He could feel his heart quickening, but looked up when Klaus finally spoke.

“Di.”

He paused.

“These past few months, everything you’ve done for me...plus the flowers, this da---dinner...why are you doing this?”

It’s not really what he meant to say, and it probably came out sounding all wrong. He can tell by the puzzled look on Diego’s face that he wasn’t expecting it either.

Diego shakes his head in confusion, looking away from Klaus and back to his hands. He starts to pull away, but Klaus tightens his grip slightly, and Diego meets his eye again, this time looking more hurt than anything. 

“I don’t want you to think I’m not grateful Di. Because I am. I am so, so thankful for everything you’ve done these past three months, and all those times before too, when I kept fucking it up.”

“Klaus, you didn’t--”

“Yes, I did, Di. You’ve always been there for me, even when I didn’t want you to be. And you never gave up on me, even when everybody else did.”

Klaus paused to squeeze Diego’s hands again.

“I know you think it’s my special night, but I never could’ve done this without you. So really, it’s also  _ your _ special night.”

Diego was blushing now, but turned his palms upward, so that he could finally squeeze back. 

“So that means, you should be getting everything that  _ you _ want too.” Klaus smiled and brushed Diego’s palm with his thumb. 

“What  _ do _ you want, Di?” Klaus asked. 

Diego’s eyebrows rose as he gulped in a breath. 

“I, just...want…”

“Are you two ready to place your order?” the waiter interrupted. 

Neither one of them acknowledged his presence, unwilling to break their gaze. 

The waiter coughed softly to get their attention, and Diego finally snapped out of whatever spell he was under, and pulled his hands back into his lap, earning a silent pout from Klaus.

Klaus smiled insincerely up at the waiter, grabbed his menu, and quickly ordered the first five items he found. 

“Where were we?” he boldly asked, as he stretched his hands across the table toward Diego. 

But Diego just looked down, keeping his hands in his lap. He paused for a moment before he finally spoke. 

“Klaus, I just want you to be happy.” He smiled, almost sadly.

Klaus laughed, earning him another confused look from Diego.

“Diego, I  _ am _ happy. Here, with you….” He shook his head.

“I didn’t think I could ever, feel this way, have this...nice, normal life. You’ve given me that. You’ve given me everything, and...I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to repay you.”

Now it was Diego’s turn to laugh. 

“You don’t have to repay me Klaus! I’m not doing all this to get something from you. I’m doing this because I ----because I want you to be happy.”

He finally reached his hands across the table to meet Klaus’s, giving them a gentle squeeze. 

“You deserve that. You deserve to be happy...You deserve a nice life.”

“Di…”   


“Here you are sirs.” 

Diego pulled his hands away as the waiter began setting down plates.

The food looked so good, Klaus had to dig in. His nerves had gotten the best of him all day, so he hadn’t been able to eat anything at lunch, and he was suddenly ravenous. Diego followed suit, and they ate in silence for a bit, pausing every now and then to compliment the food and steal awkward glances at one another. 

“Whew, I’m stuffed.”  Klaus finally sat back after all five plates were clean, rubbing his belly, which was now sticking out quite a bit above the tight waist of Vanya’s pants. 

“Yeah, me too...Hey, you wanna get outta here? Go for a walk or something?”

“Sure, yeah. That sounds nice.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for this long wait, and for such a short little chapter!  
> I've been hashing out some things, but the next chapter is already in the works. I just couldn't decide if it should be tagged along with this one. I think it will be a doozy, with some flashes from the past that are going to seriously affect the present.  
> Thanks for reading!  
> Make sure to subscribe if you're enjoying so you know when I update (:


	10. The Big Dipper

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Klaus and Diego take a walk, and some things from the past come to light.

They walked aimlessly through the city, looking through shop windows and reminiscing about old times. They eventually made their way to the park near their house.

The night air is cooler now, especially in the windy, open space of the park. It’s quieter too--no cars, no pedestrians. Just the two of them, their path lit only by the moon. 

Klaus wasn’t expecting to walk so far in his tight adolescent dress shoes, and he eventually stopped to take them off. Diego used the opportunity to remove his jacket, offering it to Klaus. 

“What is this, a rom com?” Klaus joked, as he handed his shoes to Diego and donned the blazer. 

Diego chuckled at the comment, but they continued in silence, listening to the sound of crickets in the trees surrounding the park’s perimeter. Walking through the grass was more comfortable on Klaus’s bare feet, but he finally had to stop and sit down to give them a break. He plopped himself into the grass, and gestured for Diego to follow. Klaus eventually leaned back, pulling Diego to the ground with him, so that they were both lying flat on their backs, looking up at the starry night sky. 

They lay in silence for several minutes, until Diego almost whispered, “Do you see that up there--the Big Dipper?” 

Klaus thought back to their Academy days, racking his brain for an image of Pogo pointing at some astronomy poster on the wall, but nothing comes to mind. “The name sounds familiar, but where is it exactly?”

Diego scoots closer, so that their temples are touching, and Klaus gasps at the light touch of their skin. Diego rolls his body so that he’s slightly facing Klaus, reaching his far hand up so that it’s right above his brother’s gaze, and traces the outline in the air.

“It kinda looks like a big spoon. Do ya see it?” 

“Oh yeah, I do now! Neat...Wait, how do you still remember Pogo’s boring science lessons?”

“Some of us paid attention Klaus,” Diego chuckled, lowering his hand to rest on the ground between them. “But, believe it or not, I didn’t learn about the Big Dipper from Pogo.” 

Klaus waited for an explanation, but when one didn’t come, he replied encouragingly, “Oh?”

“Yeah, actually...Ben showed it to me.” 

The thought of Diego and Ben alone, at night, seemingly as teenagers, was certainly a surprise. Moreso, the sound of Ben’s name coming from Diego’s lips was a little shocking, and Klaus’s heart suddenly ached to think of him sitting at home, alone, brooding about this date. 

Diego couldn’t quite read the look on Klaus’s face, so he pushed forward. “I found him once, in the courtyard, at night. I had been arguing with Luther, and my stupid stutter…” He paused, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath before continuing. “I ran outside, to get away, and there was Ben.” 

Klaus finally managed to get over his initial shock, and realized he had been staring blankly into outer space since this story began. So he turned toward Diego in order to give him his full attention, sensing that this was an important memory for his brother. 

“It was early, so we weren’t out past curfew, but it was dark already. Chilly. I was so mad. I couldn’t stop pacing back and forth, and I felt like I was hyperventilating. Ben--he, came over to me. Rubbed my back, asked if I was ok, whispered nice things. Until, suddenly, I was fine, like nothing ever happened.” 

Diego looked up at Klaus, smiling sweetly. 

“You remember how he used to do that? Make everyone happy? Calm us all down? God, he was just so...I don’t know…” He shook his head.

“Kind? Caring? Thoughtful?...

...Perfect?” Klaus smiled, repeating Ben’s compliment from earlier.

“Hmm,” Diego laughed quietly. “Yeah.” 

“Yeah,” Klaus repeated. 

“Anyway, he took me over to this little spot, behind the gazebo. He had this whole setup--blankets and a pillow laid out in the grass, hot cocoa in a thermos. He called it his ‘star-gazing spot’--I guess he went out there a lot to study the constellations, but that night he was there watching a meteor shower.”

_ Meteor shower...meteor shower..why is that ringing a bell? _ Klaus wondered to himself, but Diego continued before he could think too much on it. 

“He made me lay down with him, told me that ‘star-gazing always puts things into perspective.’” Diego chuckled to himself -- “I don’t do a very good Ben impression, do I?”

Klaus smiled, remembering all the drunken nights he’d spent after leaving the Academy--homeless and alone--sleeping on benches, at a park, in a dumpster, with Ben cuddled at his side, rambling on and on about constellations and Greek gods and how small we all are relative to the entire universe, until Klaus’s head stopped spinning and he could finally fall asleep. 

“It’s better than you think.”

“Anyway, it was the best night. Ben showed me all these different constellations, and told me all the ancient stories behind them--hunters and gods and goddesses and all that stuff. And we saw, like, a ton of shooting stars. I had never seen one before that night.” 

“It was all so fascinating to me--to learn something new from someone other than Pogo, or Mom. I kept thinking, ‘How does someone who’s had the same shitty upbringing as me, have so much more knowledge than me about something so interesting and beautiful?’ And Ben, he’s so intuitive, so sweet, he could tell how much I was loving it, and he told me we could watch the stars together every night, if I wanted, and he would teach me everything he knew.” 

It was silly, but Klaus found himself feeling  _ jealous _ of all things, of this night, that probably happened 10 or 12 years ago. He was trying to picture it all--remember what his brothers even looked like back then. 

And where was  _ he _ that night, anyway? 

Diego must’ve viewed his contemplative silence as a negative energy, because he interrupted Klaus’s thoughts to say, “I know...I know we don’t, really,  _ talk _ . About Ben. I just...miss him, ya know?”

Klaus nodded knowingly.

“God, I miss him  _ so much _ .” Diego said again. 

Klaus’s mind flashed back to his bedroom, where just hours ago, he could  _ almost _ feel Ben’s hands on his face, the press of Ben’s forehead against his own. He was  _ so close _ , but always just out of reach. 

Klaus closed his eyes to hold back the tears he knew would come, not ready to think about this in front of Diego. 

“Honestly, I miss all of them,” Diego added. 

Again, Klaus’s mind suddenly flashed back. This time not to his, but to Allison’s bedroom, and the sudden sense of longing he’d had for all of his siblings once he returned to that house, to rummage through their things, looking for, not just new (old) clothes, but also memories. 

Klaus could feel the tears coming even stronger now, and he squeezed his eyes shut tighter to keep them safely behind his eyelids.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, I don’t miss the others like I miss Ben. But still, I do miss them…” Diego trailed off, sinking into his own thoughts for a moment. 

Klaus still didn’t know what to say, and even if he did, he knew he wouldn’t be able to speak without turning into a blubbering mess, so he stayed silent and waited. 

“Do you wanna know why I can still remember the Big Dipper, after all these years?” Diego finally asked. 

Klaus nodded silently, keeping his eyes closed to avoid any tears spilling out. 

“That night, Ben showed me a ton of constellations. I loved hearing the stories, and trying to find the outline of the different shapes and figures, learning the names...but none of the others have stuck with me over time. The Big Dipper--it has an easier name than the others, easier to see too. Once you see it, know it--you can’t really look up at the sky without finding it. You can’t ever really forget it.” 

Diego pauses to inhale, and then exhale, before continuing. 

“Do you know how many stars make up the Big Dipper?” 

Klaus tries to imitate his brother’s steady breathing-- inhale, exhale. The tears have been restrained, for now. He opens his eyes to find Diego, inches from his face, staring back at him. He tries to speak, but the single word won’t come out, so he just shakes his head. 

“Seven,” Diego says plainly. 

Klaus gasps, and jerks his head to look up at the sky, counting. 

“Just like us,” Diego adds quietly. 

Klaus closes his eyes again, barely holding them back now.

“I realized it that night, with Ben. But I was too embarrassed to tell him; I thought he’d think it was...I don’t know...stupid, or he would laugh at me, or something...” 

“Seems stupid now, not to have told him. Before the night was even over, I realized I was being silly--Ben would never laugh at me for something like that. He was too sweet to poke fun at any of us.”

Klaus opened his eyes again, finally able to smile, thanks to the sweet words Diego spoke regarding Ben. But this time Diego wasn’t looking at him; he’d turned his gaze back toward the sky, staring up at the stars. 

“Why didn’t you? I mean, if you realized Ben wouldn’t tease you, why not tell him that night, or even the next day or something?” Klaus was proud of himself for finally contributing something to this conversation, instead of just staying silent.

Diego steadied himself again--inhale, exhale. 

“He d---Ben died the next day.”

It all comes rushing back--the screams, The Horror, the blood.  _ God, there was so much blood. _ Klaus squeezes his eyes shut again, trying to focus on his breathing. 

Then suddenly, another flash--Meteor shower. Night before Ben died. 

_ Oh my god. _

...

Klaus remembers that night. 

_ He was supposed to be there, in the courtyard. Ben had invited him the night before, when they were lying in bed, foreheads touching. He’d said there would be tons of shooting stars, and the meteor shower would peak before 10pm, so they could see them without being out past curfew.  _

_ They made a plan--Ben would bring the blankets and hot cocoa, Klaus would bring the binoculars. That way, Ben could show Klaus some of the stars in the Milky Way while they waited for the meteor shower to start.  _

_ Klaus knew--and Ben knew--that this was it. This would be the night something would happen between them. Neither knew what exactly--a hug? a kiss? a confession?--but they could feel that things were changing for them both. _

_ Except the binoculars were in Reginald’s study.  _

_ Klaus knew he could sneak in unnoticed, he’d done it a thousand times before.  _

_ And he’d almost gotten away with it this time too, but Reginald snuck up behind him in the hall as he tried to close the door silently, binoculars in hand.  _

_ He locked Klaus in the dark basement for two hours as punishment for trespassing and stealing, letting him out just in time for lights out.  _

_ Klaus had waited, unable to sleep with the sounds of the ghosts from the basement still in his brain. Once it was safe, he made his way through the dark hallway, toward Ben’s room. He wanted to tell him what had happened, explain why he missed the meteor shower.  _

_ He heard the crying before he even opened the door. He rushed into Ben’s room without knocking, and sat on the bed before Ben could even look up.  _

_ “Ben, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to!” _

_ “Klaus? Go away!”  _

_ “Benny, it was an accident! Reg--” _

_ “Just leave, ok Klaus? It doesn’t matter!” Ben shouted between sobs.  _

_ “No Benny, it does. I  _ _ wanted _ _ to come! I just got--” _

_ “Klaus--I said forget it! Just leave, ok? I don’t want you here.” _

_ Klaus began to cry. “Benny please, don’t.”  _

He was crying now, too. He’d forgotten--made himself forget--this night over the years. It’s coming back to him in such detail, it feels like it happened just yesterday. 

Diego hears the sniffles, and rolls back onto his side, scooting even closer to Klaus, almost touching. Then suddenly, Klaus remembers how their conversation ended that night. 

_ “I don’t want you to see me like this, ok? I’m sorry Klaus. I...I didn’t mean to.” _

_ At that, Ben had pushed Klaus out of his room and slammed the door. Klaus pounded, sobbing, and shouting for Ben to let him in, until Luther finally came out and dragged him back to Room # 4.  _

_ Klaus laid awake all night--at first, just crying, but later, thinking about what Ben had said.  _

_ ‘I’m sorry.’ _

_ What did Ben have to be sorry for? Klaus is the one who missed their special night.  _

_ ‘I didn’t mean to.’ _

_ What could Ben have done that would leave him in tears? _

Suddenly, Klaus realizes who might know the answer.

“So what happened that night? After he showed you all the constellations, after the meteor shower? Why didn’t you tell Ben about the seven stars thing?”

Diego sighed. “I was afraid you were gonna ask that.”

Klaus was intrigued.

“Honestly, I’ve never told anyone this. It’s kinda...weird.” 

“Well you have to tell me now.” Klaus swatted Diego playfully on the chest, smiling through his leftover tears. Before Klaus could pull his hand back, Diego grabbed it quickly, and held it in place between both of his own, resting all three of their hands gently on the ground between them. 

Klaus looked down at their hands, and then back at Diego, who was staring right back at him, but he still hadn’t answered the question.

“Di, come on, just tell me; you’re freaking me out a little bit.” 

“No, don’t freak out---it’s just...we kinda...kissed.”

Diego’s gaze faltered, and he stared at their hands as he squeezed Klaus’s a little tighter between his own.

Klaus was silent, and he didn’t know what to do with his face. 

“Klaus? Say something, will ya?”

….

Diego looked at Klaus pleadingly. “Come on---is that too weird? I mean, I know,  _ technically _ , it’s weird. Or it  _ should be _ weird. I mean--it  _ was _ weird…

But also, it was...kinda...nice.”

Klaus’s brow furrowed. _Why hadn’t Ben ever told him this?_ _And if it was ‘nice,’ as Diego says, why had Ben been crying that night?_

Finally, he spoke. “Did Ben think it was nice?”

That wasn’t the response Diego was expecting, and his face showed it. 

“Yeah. I mean, I think so. It was our first kiss. I mean, it was  _ my _ first kiss; I assume it was Ben’s as well. And it was...confusing, ya know? I mean, he’s my... _ brother _ . Before that night, I’d never really...thought of  _ him _ that way. I enjoyed his company, sure, but I had never really spent any time alone with him. That was mostly just...me and you...or you and Ben.”

Diego looked down at their hands again, where he nervously stroked Klaus’s knuckles with his thumbs.

“That night, when Ben kissed me, I felt---free. Alive, for the first time…I think Ben felt it too. But, he got nervous, or something. He just kept apologizing, and then he ran to his room…”

_ Well that doesn’t explain much _ , Klaus thought to himself.

“That was the last time we ever spoke,” Diego whispered.

A tear escaped, and pooled on the bridge of Diego’s nose. With his free hand, Klaus wiped it away, then gently rested his hand on Diego’s cheek.

“I know it’s weird, to kiss your brother.” Diego sniffed. “I’ve thought about that night a lot over the years, and...I don’t feel ashamed of it anymore. I just feel...tied to you. To all of you. In a way that I don’t think anyone else will ever be able to understand.”   


Klaus nodded.

“Our powers...our childhood, everything we went through...we’re more than just siblings, Klaus.”

“I...I know,” Klaus said, his thumb slowly rubbing circles on Diego’s cheek. 

“That’s why we’re like the stars in the Big Dipper. We’ll always be connected, together...and we’ll always be something...bigger...than just seven siblings.”

Now Klaus was crying, and he moved his hand from Diego’s face to his, wiping away his tears. 

“And I’ll always be able to find you.” Diego moved one hand away from his brother’s, and placed it softly on Klaus’s cheek.

“I try to find it every night, up in the sky. It helps me feel--connected--to all of you. Plus, it makes me think of Ben. I just...don’t ever want to...forget him.”

“Me neither,” Klaus sniffed.

Diego breathed--inhale, exhale.

“Klaus,” Diego said, looking into his eyes, “I never got to tell Ben--about the Big Dipper, about how I felt that night...I don’t want to miss that chance again.”

Diego slowly traced his thumb along Klaus’s cheekbone, and tangled his fingers into the curls at the base of his neck. Klaus closed his eyes, leaning into Diego’s soft touch, and breathed in deeply.

“I feel that same way now, Klaus. Here, with you.” 

Klaus opens his eyes to meet Diego’s. His gaze drops to Klaus’s mouth, and he instinctively wets his lips.

Slowly, Diego pulls Klaus forward.

It’s so soft--just the light press of lips--but Klaus can’t breathe. His mouth parts to get some air, but more importantly, to let his tongue slide over Diego’s lips. His scent is intoxicating, and Klaus wants to taste him too. He licks gently, waiting, until Diego’s mouth opens just enough to let Klaus in. 

Their tongues meet, gliding softly back and forth between each other’s lips. Diego brings both hands to his brother’s face, his breathing suddenly deeper, and faster. Klaus tentatively touches Diego’s chest, then his side, and then he’s pulling Diego close until their bodies press together. 

Suddenly he needs  _ more _ , and his hands slide over Diego’s back and under the hem of his shirt, as Diego twists both hands into his curls, deepening their kiss. 

His hand is reaching higher, across Diego’s bare chest, when Diego stops, resting their foreheads together. They stay there, for several deep breaths, until their breathing has slowed, and they open their eyes. 

“Klaus,” Diego whispers.

Klaus doesn’t let him finish. “I’ve wanted to do that for awhile.” 

“Really?” Diego asks, surprised. 

“Yeah,” Klaus breathes, pulling back to look into Diego’s eyes.

“Not as long as I have,” Diego laughs. 

“I know,” Klaus says, chuckling quietly.

Diego’s brow furrows. “What do you mean?”

Klaus pauses, unsure how much to divulge. 

“I found your letter. The one you wrote after I left.”

“What?! When?” 

“Just a few days ago. I went home to borrow some clothes from Allison for our date.”

Diego laughs. “And you didn’t think to tell me about that?”

Klaus looked down. “I wanted to make sure it was real, that you still felt that way,” he said quietly. 

Diego reached for his chin, nudging his face upward to meet his gaze. 

“Of course I do Klaus. I always have.”

He pulled Klaus in for another kiss, until their bodies are flush, and Klaus can feel Diego's length, pressed hard against his hip. Klaus grinds into him, a moan escaping them both as their hard cocks rub against each other under the constraining fabric of their pants.

“Let’s go home,” Klaus says breathlessly, whispering into Diego’s mouth. 

“Yeah,” Diego whimpers. He takes a few deep breaths before rolling over and pushing himself up, reaching a hand out to help Klaus.

They both readjust their pants, laughing at their predicament.

“Do you think, when we get home, we’ll…” Diego looks pointedly at Klaus’s crotch, raising his eyebrows.

“God, I hope so,” Klaus replies, reaching out to him. 

They both laugh and head home, hand in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter might get a little smutty, so be warned.


	11. Stay with Me

As soon as their apartment door closed behind them, Klaus had Diego pushed up against it, kissing him with fervor. Diego tangled his hands in Klaus’s curls at the base of his neck, as Klaus rubbed Diego’s chest and down his sides. 

Their kiss in the park was soft, new, surprising. This was different--exciting, passionate, intense. All the tension that had been building between them was boiling up and spilling out. Klaus couldn’t believe how  _ good _ this felt, how he so quickly  _ needed _ Diego. Needed  _ more _ . 

Klaus had been celibate since getting sober, and he assumed Diego had as well, since they spent basically every waking moment together. A sudden thought popped into his head, and he slowly stopped licking Diego’s tongue until Diego paused, pulling away slightly to look up at Klaus. 

“Are you--are we--is this, ok?” Diego asked, breathing heavily. 

“God,  _ yes _ ,” Klaus breathed, tipping his head back and closing his eyes. “This is  _ way _ better than ok.” 

“It’s just…” He leaned his head forward again, looking at Diego. “I just realized...God, I’m embarrassed to even tell you. Shit.”

Klaus stepped back, looking down and rubbing his forehead between his fingers and thumb.

“Hey.” Diego rested his hands on Klaus’s hips, gently pulling him forward. “Hey, it’s ok. You can tell me. I mean, you don’t  _ have _ to tell me. If you don’t want. But…” Diego lifted a hand to Klaus’s cheek. “You can, if you want.”

“It’s just, ugh. I’m nervous,” he laughed, looking away.

“ _ You’re _ nervous! Klaus, I’m the one who should be nervous. I have like, no experience.”

Klaus tilted his head questioningly. 

“Well, I have  _ some _ experience. A little. I mean, I’ve... _ had sex. _ ”

Klaus laughed, “Well that’s a relief.”

“I just…God, now  _ I’m _ embarrassed,” Diego said nervously, shuffling his feet. 

“I’ve had sex...with  _ women _ .” 

Klaus raised his eyebrows.

“I mean, I’ve tried, with men. A few times. I just...it didn’t seem...right.”

“Oh,” Klaus said despondently, stepping backward again, away from Diego. 

“ _ No _ , not like  _ that _ .” Diego tried to pull Klaus toward him, but Klaus turned to walk away. 

“No, Klaus, I mean, it didn’t seem right because...because, of you.” Klaus stopped and turned to look back, confused.

“I mean, because of...my  _ feelings _ . For you. I just...I couldn’t stop thinking about you, when I was with...other men. And that just, seemed...wrong.”

Klaus’s eyes softened and his lips parted, as if to respond, but Diego spoke first. 

“It just didn’t seem fair. To them, to me...to you.” He shrugged. “Klaus, I’ve wanted this, with you, for a long time.”

Klaus was the one pulling Diego toward him this time, until their lips met softly. 

“Ok, I told you my embarrassing thing, now you tell me yours,” Diego whispered, as he rested his forehead against Klaus’s.

“Oh God, mine’s  _ way _ worse. Yours isn’t even embarrassing! It was just sappy, and sweet, and...wholesome. Mine’s none of those things. Fuck, mine’s the  _ opposite _ of those things. I’m way more embarrassed now that I know yours!”

Klaus pulled away and gloomily plopped onto the couch.

“Well shit, now you’re freaking me out Klaus,” Diego admitted, following close behind. 

“I’m sorry--I didn’t...It’s just, when we were kissing, I realized…” He stopped, taking a deep breath before proceeding. 

“I’ve been sober for 89 days.”

“I know, I’m so proud of you Klaus.” Diego reached for the hands resting in Klaus’s lap.

Klaus smiled--“Thank you,” and went on--“I haven’t had sex in those 89 days.”

“Yeah, I know. Well, I mean, I figured, since you spend every night here,” Diego chuckled.

“Right,” Klaus continued, “and before these three months, I haven’t been sober since I was...15?”

“Yes…”

“And I started having sex right after I started using drugs…”

“Ok…”

“Which means...I’ve never…”

“Oh.” The realization hit Diego suddenly. He didn’t know why it had never occurred to him before. Of course it made sense; the thought had just never crossed his mind. 

Klaus--his poor, sweet, beautiful brother--had never gotten the chance to experience sex while sober. Thinking about it made Diego’s heart ache. He looked at Klaus, who was staring down at their entangled hands in his lap. 

“I’m sorry, I know, it’s gross. And I know it probably changes things for you. It’s ok, if you don’t--”

“Oh Klausie.” Diego turned toward Klaus, wrapping him in a tight embrace, and Klaus melted into him, both smiling and sniffling at the sound of his old nickname. 

Diego rubbed his back--it was soft, reassuring. “Sweetie, don’t say that. Don’t be sorry, it’s not gross, you have nothing to be ashamed of.”

Klaus sniffed, wiping his eyes from behind Diego’s shoulder. 

“Klaus, you have-- _ we had _ \--a shitty childhood, a traumatic past. That’s not your fault. Don’t be ashamed of something you had so little control over.” Diego pulled away, keeping his hands on Klaus’s shoulders. 

“You’re sober now, that’s all that matters. And I’m so, so proud of you for that.” Diego wiped a tear from Klaus’s cheek. 

“So you haven’t had sex sober yet, no big deal. I haven’t had sex with a man yet, so it can be a first for both of us.” 

Klaus smiled, still teary-eyed, but grateful for his brother’s kind words. “Di, I’ve never even  _ kissed _ anyone sober, before tonight. And it was  _ so good _ ; I could feel it... _ everywhere _ , and it was just a  _ kiss _ !”

Diego paused, thinking. “Is that why you’re nervous, because it felt so good?” Klaus nodded, keeping his gaze in his lap.

“Well I haven’t kissed very many people, but tonight was  _ way _ different than any kiss I’ve had before, and I’ve been sober for nearly all of them.” 

Klaus looked up. “Really?”

“Yes!” Diego said, laughing, and then he cupped Klaus’s cheeks in his hands. “Klaus, it’s  _ supposed _ to feel good, we  _ should be _ feeling it everywhere.” He could feel his breathing getting heavier, faster, just thinking about it.

“Klaus, I want--I  _ want _ to make you feel good.” He pulled Klaus’s cheeks forward until their foreheads were touching and he could feel Klaus’s hot breath against his lips. 

“I wanna make you feel good  _ everywhere. _ ”

Klaus  _ moaned _ , and he could feel the need, the  _ hunger _ bubbling up inside of him as Diego pressed an open mouth to his. He  _ did _ feel it--this tingling sensation--he could feel it  _ everywhere _ .

He rubbed his hands across Diego’s back and over his shoulders. The kissing was making him dizzy, but he quickly realized he needed to feel Diego’s skin on his. He pulled himself into Diego’s lap, bracing his hands against Diego’s broad shoulders so he could grind down. They swallowed each other’s groans with open mouths, and Diego pushed up against him, grabbing the firm swell of his ass.

Klaus fiddled with Diego’s shirt buttons, but he couldn’t manage with Diego’s tongue stroking his lips and his cock grinding against his ass, so he pulled away to focus. Diego chased him with his mouth, and placed open-mouthed kisses along his cheek and neck, sending the heat from his breath down Klaus’s spine.

He left the shirt on, but open, and Klaus could finally  _ feel _ Diego’s skin under his palms. Diego tried to keep kissing him, but he could feel Klaus touching him everywhere, and all he could do was close his eyes and lean back his head.

“God, you’re so gorgeous like this,” Klaus groaned against his neck in between hot-breathed kisses. “Never let me tease you again for spending too much time at Al’s.” Klaus stroked Diego’s chiseled abs appreciatively, and Diego grinned shakily, barely able to open his eyes under Klaus’s touch.

“Wait,” Diego finally managed to say, panting. “Wait, I can’t..not…it’s too...”

Klaus, to his credit, was somehow able to stop touching the muscles, and stared at Diego breathlessly. 

“Di?”

He was still breathing too heavy, and he gulped air between each sentence. “Klaus, wait. It’s too...fast. I wanna...I wanna. I don’t...God, I can’t, think…” 

“Hey, it’s ok, just breathe,” Klaus rested his hands on Diego’s shoulders and breathed--in, and out--as Diego followed his lead. 

“Hey,” Diego smiled up at him, resting his hands on Klaus’s hips as their breathing slowed. “Hey, I...I don’t want this to just be some quick thing that’s over before it starts. I want...I want to, go slow...to savor it...to savor  _ you _ .”

“ _ Mmmh _ .” Klaus closed his eyes. “That sounds nice.”

“Yeah?” Diego asked, gently squeezing Klaus’s hips under his blouse. Klaus nodded. 

“Can I...can we...go to your room?” 

Klaus looked up suddenly, toward the hallway leading to his bedroom door. 

_ Ben _ . 

He was probably sitting in there, waiting for Klaus to come back after dinner, like he  _ said he would _ . God, he hated not following through on shit for Ben, but surely he wouldn’t want to see the two of them like this. Surely he would understand.

Right? 

“Umm, can we go to your room instead?” Klaus murmured, feeling guilty for leaving Ben alone for this long.

“Of course, wherever you’re comfortable.”

Klaus stood up slowly, pulling Diego to his feet and leading him to the other end of the hall. He looked back toward his bedroom; he wanted to talk to Ben, tell him about their conversation at the park, see if he was ok. But that would have to wait.

Diego’s room was smaller than Klaus’s, and cleaner. Diego pulled Klaus in for a kiss--it was almost chaste, just lips touching lips. He reached inside his own jacket--which Klaus was still wearing--and easily pushed it off his shoulders. He then grabbed the hem of Klaus’s (Allison’s) blouse, slowly lifting it over his head and dropping it to the floor beneath them. His hands gently stroked up Klaus’s sides, leaving a trail of goosebumps over the newly-bared pale skin. Klaus ran his hands across Diego’s muscled chest, pushing the open shirt over his shoulders until it fell, landing atop his own.

He pushed Klaus slowly backward by the hips, until the backs of his knees hit the bed and he sat back, pulling Diego all the way down with him. Klaus was sure his skin was on fire everywhere Diego touched, but thankfully the weight of his body pressing him into the bed felt grounding. 

Only now the weight was shifting, and Klaus whimpered as Diego slid himself down the bed, smothering Klaus’s chest and stomach in the lightest of kisses along the way. 

“Klaus,” Diego exhaled, following his mouth with his fingers, tickling Klaus in the most intimate way. “You’re so beautiful,” he whispered into Klaus’s belly button, lingering there to run his tongue inside the sensitive dip of skin, causing Klaus to moan in pleasure. 

He thought he’d run the gamut on sexual experiences over the years, but he was clearly wrong. He knew it had been awhile, and maybe it was just the fact that he hadn’t had sex in over 3 months, or maybe it was that he finally let someone touch him while he’s sober, or that he’s known Diego forever and they feel comfortable with each other, or because Diego so clearly wanted to take the time to make Klaus feel good (unlike so many others before him).

_ Or maybe it was because he might be in love.  _

Whatever it was, this was something new--uncharted territory. Because no one had ever made Klaus feel like this, not once, and  _ God, they haven’t even taken all their clothes off yet _ . 

Diego was still peppering his stomach with wet kisses, but his talents must also include mind-reading, because he moved his hands lower, teasing his fingers under Klaus’s waistband. “Is this ok?” he asked as he ghosted over the button. He looked to Klaus, who lifted his head to gaze down through half-lidded eyes, nodding fervently, unable to speak. 

His arms hadn’t felt capable of movement, gripping the sheets in his hands as he writhed under Diego’s velvet touches, but now that his hands were no longer touching Klaus’s skin, he finally had the wherewithal to touch Diego. He spread his fingers through Diego’s spiky hair, wishing it was just a little longer so he could tug it gently. He rubbed a thumb over the scar above Diego’s ear, remembering fondly his daily visits to the infirmary that week ( _ what was it now, 13 years ago? _ ), when Diego, with a bandage wrapped tightly around the stitches in his head, had shared his tiny cup of chocolate pudding--a special treat reserved for when one of the children was injured. 

His mind was pulled back to the present, as Diego shimmied Klaus’s (Vanya’s) tight trousers lower, prompting him to lift his hips off the bed. He peeled them off slower than necessary, keeping eye contact, and sneaking soft touches to Klaus’s bare legs on the way down. He didn’t know how Diego was doing it, but the parts of his legs that Diego was touching felt electric, and Klaus decided stubbornly this must be the first time anyone has ever touched his legs, it felt  _ so good _ . He was making these pathetic little mewls with each caress, and Klaus suddenly thought those long skinny fingers must have powers beyond throwing knives. 

He wasn’t someone who got self-conscious easily, especially when it comes to sex, but he felt vulnerable like this--exposed. He was laid out under the bright bedroom lights in his tiny cotton briefs with a prominent boner, pants around his ankles, whimpering like an injured cat--all while Diego looked up at his pale skinny body through those beautiful brown eyes, and there weren’t even any drugs to lessen his senses.

But there was no time to succumb to self-doubt, because Diego finally got one pant leg off, and stopped to slowly press both thumbs into Klaus’s arch, shooting pleasure up his leg. He massaged his thumbs up to the ball of his foot, and Klaus moaned--a deep, guttural sound filling the room. He repeated the process with the other foot, before holding both feet together gently, kissing the tops of each toe. Then farther up, kissing calves and shins, knees and quads. And just before Klaus got distracted by the melody of “Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes,” Diego was pressing soft lips to his inner thighs. They trembled, and Klaus rolled his hips involuntarily, grinding into the air, desperate to feel pressure somewhere else. 

Again, Diego must be able to read his mind, because now his mouth was open, pressing hot breaths against Klaus’s length through his striped gray briefs, and that first touch ( _ finally! _ ) was all it took for him to feel a slight dampness inside the cotton.

“Oh my God,  _ Diego, _ ” Klaus breathed, clumsily pawing at his face, silently begging him for more. But Diego just continued his upward path, retracing the line of kisses across Klaus’s stomach and chest, stopping a bit longer this time on his neck. Diego was laying on top of him again--providing the perfect amount of pressure--and between his uncontrollable head rolls--trying to give Diego more access to his sensitive neck--Klaus suddenly realized that Diego was still fully clothed from the waist down.

Now it was Diego’s turn to whimper, as Klaus ran his hands lightly, but quickly along Diego’s sides, with an end target in sight. He reached his hands between their bodies and pushed up slightly, giving himself just enough room to unfasten Diego’s pants, pushing them down fast and reaching around to slip them over Diego’s full cheeks. He couldn’t reach any further to get them past his thighs, but Diego wouldn’t stop kissing his neck to help, so Klaus managed to quickly flip them both over. 

The change in dynamic was certainly a surprise to Diego, and the brief moment of being in charge provided a heady feeling for Klaus. 

He sat up, bracing himself by pressing firmly on Diego’s chest, while straddling his hips and grinding down. The lack of pants this time was electrifying, and Klaus could  _ feel _ Diego’s boner trying to push through the thin fabric of their underwear. He crawled backward, pulling Diego’s black boxer briefs down along with his pants. He longed for the patience Diego displayed earlier, but he was wound far too tightly now. 

“Off, God, take these  _ off _ ,” he demanded, as Diego tried to help by wiggling his legs back and forth. 

Klaus’s mouth was practically watering when he finally got them off and looked back up at Diego. 

“Shit, Di,” he gasped, as he got his hands on Diego’s hips and pressed him into the mattress. He kissed the head lightly and licked the sensitive ridge underneath, delighting in the wail that seemed to come from somewhere deep in Diego’s beautiful belly. He licked his lips and rubbed his open mouth and tongue down both sides to get it wet, making Diego squirm and grip the sheets tightly in both fists. He was about to open wide and swallow as far down as he could, when Diego somehow managed to pull him away, dragging Klaus up toward his panting mouth.

“Klaus,” he wheezed. He was breathing heavily, and took deep breaths mid sentence. “You don’t...have to do that…I want--”

“God Diego,  _ please _ , I just wanna  _ taste _ you. I’ll stop if you don’t like it.” He was practically whining into Diego’s lips before their open mouths pressed into each other, breathing hot air back and forth. 

“ _Fuuuck_ ,” Diego growled. “Of course I like it.  _ Shit _ , it feels  _ so good. _ I just, I wanna--” 

He rolled his hips up, grinding their hard cocks together as if he couldn’t control his own movements, and Klaus really wished he’d had the foresight to get totally naked before now. 

“I just want-- _ fuck _ \--Klaus, I--I can’t. I’m not gonna last-- _ shit _ ,” Diego bawled.

“Oh  _ thank God _ , me neither.” 

Klaus rested his forehead on Diego’s chest as he somehow mustered enough self-control to lift his hips away from Diego’s. Diego  _ whined _ , trying to pull Klaus back to him, but Klaus’s feet were on the floor, and he was pulling his briefs down so fast he practically fell back into the bed as he hopped frantically from one foot to the other.

He licked Diego again, and this time got his whole mouth around him--briefly--just long enough to  _ feel _ them both moan, sending vibrations up Diego’s cock and down Klaus’s spine. He pulled off and planted a single kiss to Diego’s slit, happy to finally get a taste of the creamy liquid pooled there. 

He straddled Diego before laying back on top of him. They were kissing and moaning and dry humping each other like teenagers, but Klaus’s spit and their pre-come was actually slickening the way a bit and Klaus couldn’t stop wondering how it was possible for this to feel so good. Usually he needed to be fucked or choked or both to even think about coming, but he just took his underwear off 30 seconds ago and he was almost there. 

He sat back on his knees and pulled Diego up to a sitting position so their chests were pushed tightly together. They wrapped their arms around each other in a warm embrace, as they nipped at ears and necks and shoulders. Their cocks were pressed between their taut bellies, and the pressure was so warm and wonderful, Klaus thought he might not last another second. 

But he managed to squeeze a hand between them to wrap around them both, leaving Diego gasping at the new feeling. 

“Fuuuck,  _ Klaus _ ,” Diego panted through Klaus’s quick strokes.

“Oh God, Di,  _ shit _ , I can’t, I’m...I’m---”

It shot up between them, landing on Diego’s chest and dripping down onto Klaus’s hand, helping it glide more smoothly over both of them. As soon as Diego felt the slippery sensation, he was coming too, painting Klaus’s stomach and groaning into his neck. 

Klaus continued stroking them softly until their breathing began to slow and it became too much. Diego rested his forehead on Klaus’s chest, prompting Klaus to lean down and kiss his hair, then turn to rest his cheek on top of Diego’s head. 

“Klaus,” Diego sighed, once his breathing had finally slowed. “Mmmh,” he moaned appreciatively, pulling Klaus back down playfully to lie on top of him so he could rub his back. 

“Di! We’re gonna get your sheets all messy!” 

“Mmm, don’t care,” he replied sleepily into Klaus’s curls. 

Klaus laid there another moment before the sleepiness settled in and he couldn’t keep his eyes open any longer. He readjusted his legs and rolled onto his side, keeping an arm around Diego’s chest. Diego’s arms were both wrapped around Klaus so tightly, he didn’t think he could move even if he wanted to. He entwined his legs into Diego’s and pressed a kiss to his neck, then rested his head on Diego’s shoulder.

“Mmm,” Klaus sighed. 

“Stay with me?” Diego whispered, before they both drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a pretty inexperienced writer, especially with sexy stuff. This was the first sex scene I've ever written, so it took me awhile to get a feel for it, especially without a beta reader (any volunteers for future chapters??!) It was fun for me to imagine all the different ways it could've gone, and I hope it's satisfactory to those of you who have read this far! 
> 
> I also want to note that I apologize for continuing to increase the number of chapters every time I update. When I started this, I envisioned telling the whole story in about 4 chapters, and as you can see, it's gotten way out of hand. Honestly, I don't know how it's going to end anymore! I hope some people are still reading and enjoying (: 
> 
> Since I'm pretty new, I'd love to read comments about what you enjoyed/disliked, especially about the sex. I was at a real loss on where to begin, and couldn't even decide which tense to use. I kept going back to change everything from past to present, and then back again! 
> 
> Thanks, as always, for reading and commenting!


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